Hey there beautiful soul, longing to be the very best you can be for yourself and your family. How are you doing today? Really?
How are you doing? I know you’re striving and grinding on the daily.
Have you checked in with yourself lately amid the busy holiday season?
I want you to feel free to love yourself, to cherish your whole self and all of who you will continue to grow to be.
No matter the number on a scale, the image in a mirror, the current perception of comparison you’re being pressured to internalize, I want you to know you are worth so much more than you give yourself credit for. While you may have a long history of self-neglect, you are deserve the intentionality for self-care, self-love, and self-respect.
Have you ever been willing to prioritize those items on your to-do list?
Above all things in today’s message I want you to be encouraged to tune-in to your magical essence and intuition. You are created different than me and other men. Sometimes, us gentleman… well, we are not that great at picking up on all the little subtle signs of a situation or being able to read the emotions and mystical energies in the world.
But you?
Oh, well you on the other hand are a whole other creature.
“Every girl and every woman, has the potential to make this world a better place, and that potential lies in the act of thinking higher thoughts and feeling deeper things. When women and girls, everywhere, begin to see themselves as more than inanimate objects; but as beautiful beings capable of deep feelings and high thoughts, this has the capacity to create change all around. The kind of change that is for the better.” – C. JoyBell C
Having been raised by a single mom toiling towards a sense of sustainment while batting with complex chronic illness and societal constraints at every step of the journey, I have a special place in my heart when it comes to women who live their lives as selfless servant leaders - a noble warrior worth our respect but also worth our time and attention to give them a day off for once.
Give them a greater chance at inner peace, inspired wisdom, intuitive confidence, and we stand to gain the exponential benefits of happier, healthier women in our society. Warrior women. Super Moms. Incredible Caretakers and the like.
Trust me, I love you. I applaud you. I celebrate and champion you.
But I do think that sometimes it is in the constant serving that women like yourselves forget yourself - who you were, who you are, and who you want to be.
So how ‘bout that daily (or at least weekly) check-in? How’s that going?
I want you to feel wholly well and holy whole. I want you to think, feel, and know inside the inner depths of your heart that you are loved by others - and yourself - and your creator.
I want you to embark on the difficult journey to rekindle your inner sanctity inside your soul that perhaps you once lost after your firstborn child was born or even an inner sense of self that you were never allowed to have because you were raised as a young woman in the “Silent Generation.”
You are an image of hope for so many. You are the empowering caretaker in which so much of our familial and communal hope truly relies. The human heart longs for a mother’s touch, for a woman’s compassion, kindness, love, and respect.
Maybe it’s because I’m speaking from the perspective of a single man observing the natures of our reality throughout the current era of chaotic civilization and our human history…. but I believe that so much of our societal infrastructure relies on the position of a strong woman leading in the traditional feminine power - nurturing the growth and prosperity of others with some great sense of power most men could not fathom to hold themselves.
Like I said, women are a different creature entirely.
There is a great influence of deep attachment that comes by way of the physical birth and brutally beautiful event of bringing in new life.
I’m talking about the kind of attachment that defines a person’s psyche, their hope and faith in the world at large.
Yes, we have certainly seen the severe detriment to the lack of solid men in the lives of young boys and girls, but taking in the potential comparison, that we see better outcomes with kiddos having a strong mom versus those that lack such an impressionable loving touch, sensual healing that connects the souls and spirits with a sweet song at bedtime or a kiss on freshly scratched knee or a morning serenade of “You are my sunshine…. my only sunshine.”
“Taking joy in living is a woman’s best cosmetic.” – Rosalind Russell
Maybe I’m just a capital R Romantic when I speak of the profound impact and impression that women play in our culture, but the better we support women, the better we all end up in the end. Giving women a sincere chance at joy and good health is a massive ROI for society as a whole.
Public Health leaders know this to be true at both the macro and micro. The way forward in raising healthy individuals and nurturing healthy families in many rights, is often by way of supporting women more, giving them a chance to take care of themselves and catch their breath in the midst of trying to take on all of the demands of regular life.
Women carry an invisible burden of holding up the mental, emotional, and spiritual health of a culture and society. And in our day and age with a spineless, lost and broken masculinity severed of any historical sacredness, we allow women to be overburdened and burnout by selflessly serving to the Nth degree with a never-ending demanding list of expectations placed on them by a poor-spirited masculine social norm. Thus, the physical and social realms of society continue to be pillaged and plundered without any courageous values to lead a people out of exile.
Men seem to be ill-tempered, fickle, and fractured in their own narratives these days and women are left lost picking up
all
the
pieces
by
themselves
again, and again.
Now, I’ll be speaking to men more specifically here soon, but just know this - the two are distinctly different, separate and inseparable, nonetheless. We uniquely impact and influence one another at a divine level with powerful yin- and yang forces of masculine and feminine varieties. We need women to be well in this world. That’s a fact.
And many women today are facing unprecedented challenges to their health from every direction of their lives and every minute of every day.
From chemicals in cosmetics to heavy metals in lipstick.
From high levels of stress and societal demands provoking disordered eating, nutrient depletions and chronic yo-yo dieting.
From disgusting marketing tactics used to manipulate women’s emotions to push their purchasing behavior towards a stereotype of Clorox Bleach, Betty Crocker, and Jif Peanut Butter.
From INSANE levels of thyroid disorders across this country like Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis to Grave’s Disease and every other phase of hypo-, or hyper- thyroid
From an absolute inundating bombardment of forever chemicals and endocrine disruptors being handled by women in the workforce and home living activities like laundry, hair, makeup, cleaning products, dish soap, and more.
To the extremely common archetype I tend to find in my female clients who go through a life crisis of personal worth, waging war with their own levels of grit as they ambitiously tackle the first 1-2k days of their child’s life, most often taking on the primary weight of responsibilities for taking care of that child or multiple children.
And in today’s society, it is sadly so uncommon for women to have a team of fellow women ready, able, and willing to leap at the chance to support this new mom or new family. I see so much downstream after 3-5 years of complete self-neglect as a result of living their entire life for the purpose of caretaking for their children - a very necessary role - but unconsciously allowing their own health and happiness to slowly be sucked away as they compartmentalize their own identity until a later date.
Something has to change for a safer, stronger, more secure pathway for families to remain as families… and HOPEFULLY progress into even stronger, better, more dynamic and more secure structural foundations for the rest of our society doing forward.
Far too many women go through an early pregnancy feeling alone and making decisions alone.
Far too many women go through childbirth without anyone at their side to hold their hand or take pictures besides the doctors and nurses they’ve only recently met.
Far too many women go through the incredible gift of childbirth and journey of fresh motherhood without a mentor or previous mother with experience and insight to help at every step of the way.
You can carry this argument over into women in the workforce, women in music, art, culture at large who lack a genuine and sincere connected role model living and breathing love and grace into their life. I hear stories like this often, but it still makes me question what we are doing if this has become our given social norm:
“I was a new mom. I was young and didn’t have any idea what I was doing. I had no one to go to. I was just living life as I only knew, trying to take care of my baby and didn’t have any time to think about my own needs until my child reached school-age. Only then was I able to take a moment to breathe by myself. I started to rethink my life, really think about who I wanted to be and how I wanted to be the best mom I could for my baby’s life. How can I really work on myself and make sure I’m doing the best I can for me to make sure I’m here healthy and able to keep taking care of my baby and my family as we grow older.”
“It feels like I haven’t thought about myself in years. I just never thought about what I wanted. I never asked myself what I wanted for dinner, I just fed everyone else and consumed leftovers while I was doing the dishes and cleaning up. If my kid didn’t eat all their food, I ate the scraps. I just lost sight of myself in the mess and the madness of raising a newborn, I guess. But now I’m starting to rethink what I’m doing and how I want to live my life. Do I want to start doing Yoga like I enjoyed in college? Maybe I start singing more like I used to when I was just a kid myself? I need to do something that’s all I know.”
I know so many women that put themselves last and overextend themselves for the service of others. While great in the moment of immediate needs being fulfilled, this routine is unsustainable for the long-term. There requires a better balance in our lives for us to move forward. If we don’t learn how to balance ourselves, we end up falling over the faster we try to pedal. We kick our feet and grit our teeth but without the power of balance we run the risk of causing ourselves great harm.
Truly, if we want our lives and the lives of those we impact to be fully supported and promoted to their own self-sustainment we must recognize the great opportunity for appropriate boundaries and non-negotiable in your own self-care journey.
Melissa Urban writes a great book, The Book of Boundaries.
If you don’t know Melissa, she’s the co-founder and CEO of Whole30, global leader in health, wellness, self-improvement, and advocate for higher conscious living.
Gretchen Rubin has another great book that discusses a similar vein of conversation for women - The Four Tendencies. While this book is not specific to Women ALONE, I do think it is quite relevant and profoundly insightful for most women.
Learn more in the video below and consider the book here.
After watching the brief explanatory video, do you consider yourself more of a Rebel, Obliger, Upholder, or a Questioner?
On another day I’d like us to take a deep dive
into Women’s Health as it relates to Thyroid Disorders
and expand on the necessary action we must take
to support women MUCH better in this country.
Personally, I know so many women who have been negatively impacted by the various disease and disorders that effect the thyroid.
Hair is falling out. Overheating. Overly anxious. Unexpected weight gain and unexpected weight loss. Inflammatory conditions of the eye, skin, and lymphatics.
Unable to self-regulate mind, body, emotions, temperature, and temperament.
Women deserve a better way, a better chance, and better insight and empowerment to support their own self-discoveries in health and wellbeing.
In the meantime, I’ll leave you with some of my favorite Instagram handles and Websites to follow for holistic Women’s Health promotion.
Dr. Aviva Romm - Website
Natural Nurse Momma - Lauren’s Instagram
Dr. Mariza Snyder - Website - Instagram - Podcast
Melissa Urban (as mentioned earlier)
Within Nutrition - Kylie Ivanir - Instagram
Empowered Autoimmune - Ali Le Vere - Instagram
awholehealthlife - Meg Kilcup - Instagram
Sara Gotfried MD - Instagram
Kayla Barnes - Instagram
Karalynne Call - Just.Ingredients - Instagram - Facebook Page
A non exhaustive list, but some good places to start or expand your own wellness information input!
I also highly recommend Parsley Health for those in need of a qualified functional medicine doctor and health coach team to support their healing journey.
If you want schedule a 1-1 call to discuss your health and connect the dots, let me know in the comments below.
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